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The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

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Write for Us
Want your voice to be heard? Submit a letter to the editor, send us an op-ed pitch or check out our open positions for the chance to be published by the Daily Utah Chronicle.
@TheChrony
Print Issues

The Pros And Cons Of A Trump Presidency

The+Pros+And+Cons+Of+A+Trump+Presidency

PRO – Trump could solve the “immigration crisis” by making America such an undesirable destination that no one will want to come here. No wall needed.

CON – On the other hand, a Trump Presidency would result in a huge migration of birds to America, as they mistake his hair piece for a nest.

PRO – For the second time in a row, a person of color will be President of the United Sates. That color? Orange.

CON – Unfortunately, orange doesn’t really go well with other colors.

PRO – Thousands of people will finally have the motivation they need to fulfill their lifelong dream of moving to Europe, ushering in a new era of great literature written by American ex-pats living in Paris.

CON – Paris is really freaking expensive.

PRO – The White House will get some classy additions. Like, you know, slot machines.

CON – The White House will become the “Whites-Only House.”

PRO – The inevitable reality TV show, “The Real Housewives of President Donald J. Trump,” and all the cringe-worthy hilarity that that entails.

CON – The inevitable thermo-nuclear war with whoever rubs Trump the wrong way.

[email protected]

@jusstadams

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