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The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

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The Dysfunctional Love Triangle: You, Me and Competition

The+Dysfunctional+Love+Triangle%3A+You%2C+Me+and+Competition

Dating is difficult. It’s hard to find someone who shares the same interests as you, who feels the way you do, and someone you can see often. That’s why most people tend to pick people who are in the same social sphere as them.

Take athletes for example. Athletes are consistently practicing, training and competing. They almost never have time to settle down and date someone who isn’t in their sphere. So athletes tend to gravitate towards other athletes in terms of who to date.

However, here lies the problems. Everyone knows the famous athlete couples like gymnast Shawn Johnson and football player Andrew East. Fortunately for these two, their sports are quite different and while Johnson is retired, East is currently a free agent, and it cuts down on any competitiveness.

But what about Steffi Graf and Andre Agassi? Both Graf and Agassi are tennis players and while Agassi has won eight grand slam events, his wife has won 22 grand slams, overshadowing him.

In every relationship, there are ups and downs, but imagine dating someone in the same sport as you. For Johnson and East, it might be a match made in heaven, but for Graf and Agassi, it might be a hot mess.

Yes, athlete couples might be of different genders, so the physical difference would seem like a good line that separates any sort of resentment or competition of one doing better than the other. However, that line is often non-existent to these couples.

Competitiveness is inevitable in all sports so if someone is dating another person in the same sport, competitiveness is taken to a whole new level. While sometimes that competitiveness in the relationship can cause each person to strive to be better, it also can cause resentment.

I used to swim competitively and I actually met my longtime boyfriend on one of my old club teams. I hated talking to him about practice. If I was on a slower time base than him and complained about the set, he would say that it was harder for him because he was on a faster time base.

One time we raced each other, but while I was swimming a 200-yard backstroke, he swam a 200-yard breaststroke. I beat him, but his defense was that he was swimming a slower stroke than me so of course, I should have beaten him.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my boyfriend, but that competitiveness between us caused a lot of fights and I’m kind of happy that I no longer swim because while I appreciate and understand everything he does in the sport, I no longer have to compete with him.

Also, when you date someone in the same sport, or even the same team as you, any team punishment they receive, you receive as well. Any low’s they feel you feel as well. And any bad practices they have, you have.

Before we came to college, my boyfriend and I swam together on Fullerton Aquatics Sports Team. There, we had some pretty intense practices and during the summer, they got harder. During our second practice of the day on a summer afternoon, our coach decided to do timed swims.

Both my boyfriend and I, and some others were swimming 200-meter IM’s while the rest of the group swam 200-meter freestyle. Some people who were swimming free where going at the same time as the IMer’s and my coach was getting mad because it didn’t allow people to race others fairly. So he said that all the freestylers go in one heat and the IMer’s go in another heat.

For some reason, there was a lane open for the freestyle heat and our coach was getting mad so my boyfriend panicked and got up in the lane and he swam his 200 IM. That was when all hell broke loose, and my coach started yelling, threw his hat on the ground and said that we all had to swim a 10,000-meter swim for time as punishment.

I got so mad that for the entire one-hour car ride home I laid into my boyfriend and yelled at him for his mistake. The punishment swim sucked and I cried, but eventually I forgave my boyfriend. However, that fight was stupid and it should have never happened.

While athletes dating other athletes can have some benefits of understanding that sometimes naps and 12-hour periods of sleeps are necessary, most date nights will be just watching Netflix and ordering pizza, and there will be times when you don’t even see your significant other for a few days due to practice schedule conflicts.

But from personal experience, dating someone on the same team as you causes too many problems. From stupid blowout fights to teammates getting too involved in the relationship, athletes should steer clear of dating other athletes.

[email protected]

@emileewhiteee

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