The defenders of marriage are at it again

By By Andrew Cannon

By Andrew Cannon

The year 2004 was a year of tremendous significance. The Boston Red Sox finally won the World Series, Spain suffered a terrible terrorist attack, George W. Bush was re-elected, the “Star Wars” trilogy was finally released on DVD and “Fahrenheit 9/11” shattered the box office ticket sales record for a documentary film.

For those who genuinely believe that a culture war is taking place, or that a nefarious homosexual agenda is being promulgated, the outlawing by 11 states of gay marriage was truly a victory in 2004.

Yes, Antonin Scalia, Rick Santorum and our own Orrin Hatch can now choose any one of 11 states (including Utah) in which they can live free of the threat to their own heterosexual marriage by homosexual marriage. Nor do they have to worry about, as Santorum apocalyptically warned, “the slippery-slope” of gay marriage leading to (in Santorum’s eloquent words) “man-on-child or man-on-dog.”

Thank you, valiant protectors of heterosexual marriage!

Homosexuals aren’t the only ones, apparently, who have been affected by the conservative outrage at the potential violation of the sanctity of marriage. Britney Spears obviously recognized that marriage was so holy that she got married twice in 2005 (one of which lasted all of 55 sanctified hours), Jennifer Lopez entered into her third marriage this past year, which, by conservative logic, must make her three times more holy than all of you monogamous, married-for-life folks.

It will be interesting to see how long marriage continues to be at the top of the agenda for religious right-wingers of the Republican Party.

Here in Utah, the protection of marriage is being nobly carried forth by Peggy Wallace, R-West Jordan. Wallace has introduced legislation that would make no-fault divorce a thing of the licentious past. Divorces are too easy to obtain for couples when things get hard because the shame in divorce has been eliminated through no-fault divorce, according to Wallace.

Though not a single gay marriage threatened a heterosexual Utah couple, an amendment banning it was passed.

Will supporters of Amendment 3 have the moral consistency to support Wallace’s legislation, which aims at something that really threatens to break up traditional marriage?

Don’t misunderstand me; I’m against any such legislation. But I also voted against Amendment 3. I think people should have the right to be with whomever they love regardless of race, religion or sex. I also believe that the right to get out of such a relationship, for whatever reason an individual deems important, should be recognized as legitimate.

If, in 2004, you rabidly defended “traditional” marriage from the encroaching “pink menace,” then show some ideological consistency and courage and support Wallace’s legislation.

If you see the folly in protecting marriage by forcing unhappy couples to stay together, then let Rep. Wallace know (you can e-mail her at [email protected]). And don’t forget to contact your own representative.

Maybe this year, we can wise up about marriage, and let people marry who they love and end it when they want. Maybe this year, as the final “Star Wars” prequel is released, we’ll recognize gay marriage and no-fault divorce for what they are: a phantom menace.

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