Letter to the Editor: I accept gay marriage, but what about the kids?


I guess this letter might be a little untimely, or probably offbeat. But recently, when the Pride Parade photos were printed, I thought this would be a good time to send in this letter, which is more about the debate I have with myself.

I am not against gay marriage-in fact, I am all for it. I truly respect homosexuals and believe that they have the right to be what they want, and be with whom they want to be.

But there is one thing that kind of confuses me and puts me in a double mind about the issue: gay/lesbian parenting.

Though change is the only thing that remains constant, one thing that surely cannot change is the incapability of men to give birth.

Everyone has the right to fight for his rights and to live the life he wants, but who is fighting for the kids?

Is it that only the grown-ups can fight for their rights? What about the rights of humanity that still can’t speak? Who will speak for them?

My confusion with the gay/lesbian parenting revolves around the actual raising of the kid.

Men and women are very different emotionally, and in my opinion the child has every right to experience all the emotions as he learns the truths of life.

Some might argue that when homosexual relations occur, one of the two takes the role of the man and other of the woman, but yet a man is still a man and a woman is still a woman.

Some might also argue that you can’t judge same-sex parenting or say it’s not going to work without giving it a try.

I have a question: Can you see yourself having two daddies or two mommies?

There are a lot more complications than just two people of the same sex staying together. If someone decides to live this lifestyle, fine by me, and I guess it should be fine by anyone because that’s what the fight is about.

But why do you want to put the child through a childhood he or she does not deserve? You cannot always be around when he or she is teased in school: “Oh, you are the one with two daddies.”

Though we can debate this endlessly, something that even change will take a long time to change is accepting that your parents are gays or lesbians. I guess that will be the toughest fight that waits in this debate for rights and duties.

Ruchika Joshi

Graduate Student,

Mechanical Engineering