Brigham Young University
The Daily Universe
In the opinion article “Thou Shalt,” written June 29, The Universe reported, “Those who believe in the Bible and the Ten Commandments in Exodus declare that it’s just a very good set of rules to follow: Don’t kill-murder is just another name for this; Don’t steal-not too new either; Don’t take someone else’s wife-how many divorces could be prevented?”
Deleted before it hit the press was “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s ass-think of all the civil unions that wouldn’t be broken.”
In the June 24 article, “SOAR program encourages minority students,” The Universe also reports, “Nothing teaches trust like being led blindfolded by a stranger through a bed of tacks.”
With the exception of sleeping in the same bed as Michael Jackson.
Utah Valley State College
The College Times
In the article “Top Ten,” posted June 19, The College Times listed the top 10 suggested name-changes for its newspaper. They are: 10) The University Times, 9) The UVSC Expositor, 8) The Movie and Music Review Weekly, 7) The Daily Kougar, 6) The Paper of Mormon, 5) All-Negative News, 4) The UV Monologues, 3) The Pain in My @$$, 2) The Daily Universe, and 1) Sequel Magazine.
The staff at The Summer Utah Chronicle suggested “The Daily Bubble.”
Weber State University
The Signpost
“Three engineering majors from Weber State University recently designed and built a wheelchair that is both self-propelled and guided by a satellite-based Global Positioning System,” The Signpost reported in the June 28 article, “Students engineer satellite-guided wheelchair.”
“I got the idea from a GPS-guided Snowcat,” said Scott Cornford.
“I had a robotics interest and I got a good deal on an electrical wheelchair.”
The wheelchair was recently purchased by the U.S military and will be used in Iraq later in the month.
Also out of The Signpost: “When Weber State University freshman Stacey Speck drove home from campus last Fall Semester, something caught her attention in the intersection of Edvalson Street and Dixon Drive,” The Signpost reported in the June 28 article “Campus crash hot spots.”
“To my left where you pull out, there was a man in front of a car lying there,” Speck said. “He was not moving at all and the police were just arriving on the scene.”
The next day, she saw chalk lines drawn around the tire marks.
“I think they were trying to find out who was at fault,” she said.
Or they were playing a new version of hopscotch called ‘cop scotch’ in which the loser buys everyone a Krispy Kreme donut.
Salt Lake Community College
The Globe
Controversy brews on the SLCC campus on the topic of whether or not bringing your child to class is appropriate.
“Why should women have to give up mothering just so they can have a degree?” said Christy Bills, a student from Salt Lake City, as quoted in the La Leche League International newsletter, New Beginnings. “Men don’t seem to have the same constraint.”
SLCC student Joe Buck said he was angry at her comments and added “What about the man boob? With this invention, tens of men have experienced the joy of breast feeding.”
Buck did not mention whether or not the man boob came with those really attractive nursing bras with three-inch straps.