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The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

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Write for Us
Want your voice to be heard? Submit a letter to the editor, send us an op-ed pitch or check out our open positions for the chance to be published by the Daily Utah Chronicle.
@TheChrony
Print Issues

Surprise superhero

Feeling terrified and helpless, the bank teller realizes he has no choice but to do whatever the merciless robber asks of him.

Suddenly, a loud beat penetrates the bank walls and a man wearing tight spandex, a headband and a large “A” on his polyester tank top leaps onto the scene.

“Oh no, boss, it’s Aerobics Man!” one of the robbers screams in horror.

Methodically and rhythmically, Aerobics Man takes out every evil villain, and after clearing the scene of the vice, he proudly declares, “I kick trash to the beat!”

Everything seems to be going Aerobics Man’s way, but one day, he meets his arch-nemesis, Dr. Surround Sound.

Without remorse, Dr. Surround Sound drowns out Aerobics Man’s ever-important beat, causing him to be worthless.

Depressed and miserable, Aerobics Man decides it’s time to hang up the spandex and go back to his days as a bus driver.

Realizing the world needs Aerobics Man, his best friend Radio Man quickly stops him from tossing away his spandex and says, “Aerobics Man! The beat is not in the radio! The beat is in you!”

OK, grab a tissue. It’s over. The plot to this riveting story was given to me from a dear friend, and surely one day it will be a blockbuster hit.

I remember laughing uncontrollably when I first read the idea of Aerobics Man, but then I realized there was a lot of good to it. It really did have universal application.

Everyone has to find that certain special thing he or she is good at. Or, everyone has to find that “beat” within. That’s what keeps us, as a people, moving forward.

If we don’t feel like we’re good at anything, we can lose confidence and no longer have a desire to achieve greatness.

It usually doesn’t even take much. For Aerobics Man, he was good at working out; for Radio Man-well, he could play sweet tunes. For you, it could be something as simple as being a great horseshoe slinger.

I’ve found that when you have a cornerstone to build your confidence on, you begin to find out that you excel at several things, and it makes you feel you have something special to offer the world.

I’ve noticed that some people substitute actual accomplishments for supremacy in an artificial environment, and I guess even that may just be the stepping stone those people need to get themselves going.

For example, some people play video games, and take the role of the hero in the game. By becoming the character synthetically, it makes them feel as though they are able to conquer worlds, kill demons, win a Super Bowl or out-dance James Brown.

Sometimes it doesn’t take much, and sometimes people are too hard on themselves. If you’re the greatest ping-pong player this side of Salt Lake City, take pride in it.

You don’t have to be bulletproof, immensely strong or have the ability to fly.

Maybe you just need to be great at making that strange person on the bus feel like he or she exists; or maybe you need to be great at making people laugh.

Whatever your thing may be, the world needs you. It’s in need of as many superheroes as it can get. So get ready, toss on those tight spandex pants and remember: “The beat is not in the radio; the beat is in you!”

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