“Apocalypto”Directed by Mel GibsonIt’s like that old gingerbread man story (“Run, run, as fast as you can…”), but instead of a gingerbread man it’s a Mayan fleeing for his life from a rival tribe that wishes to sacrifice him to its gods. Actually, it’s not like the gingerbread man story at all. (R)
“Blood Diamond”Directed by Edward ZwickLeonardo DiCaprio tries on a funny accent for the second time this year as a South-African mercenary who teams up with a fisherman (Djimon Hounsou) to search for valuable conflict diamonds-named so because they help finance local wars.The De Beers diamond-trading group is protesting this movie because it feels it might discourage people from buying diamonds. The company is quick to point out that only 1 to 4 percent of its diamonds are of the conflict variety and that most are harvested off the dead bodies of gunned-down rappers. (R)
“Unaccompanied Minors”Directed by Peter FeigA blizzard strands a rambunctious herd of misfit kids at the airport on Christmas Eve-which, like, sucks big time, to borrow from the whippersnapper lingo.If you only see one movie this holiday season in which blustering, bumbling adults get punched in the nuts by on-the-loose kids…then I pity you greatly. (PG)
“The Holiday”Directed by Nancy MeyersSick of their stupid boyfriends, Brit (Kate Winslet) and Yank (Cameron Diaz) swap stylish abodes-and wackiness ensues.With all the crackling fires, sunny dispositions and snuggling men (Jude Law and Jack Black), this looks like the sexiest Folgers commercial EVER.”The best part of waking up…”(Cue Jude Law kissing Cameron Diaz the morning after.)”…is Folgers in your cup!” (PG-13)
“So Much So Fast”Directed by Steven Ascher and Jeanne JordanIt’s either a documentary about one man’s battle with Lou Gehrig’s disease and how his girlfriend and brother cope, or it’s how to describe 99 percent of engagements in Utah. (NR)
“Old Joy”Directed by Kelly ReichardtAh, there’s nothing like getting together with some old friends, driving up into the mountains and kicking back for some R&R.Wait, what’s that noise? Someone plucking a banjo in the distance? Nah, don’t worry about it. (NR)
MIDNIGHT MADNESS AT THE TOWER! FRIDAY AND SATURDAY!”Scrooged”Directed by Richard DonnerColdhearted TV executive Frank Cross (Bill Murray) is visited by three ghosts in this modern (well, 1988) take on Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol.In the movie’s deleted scenes, Murray is visited by the Ghost of Christmas Future, and instead of being scared, he whips out his proton pack and zaps the ghost with a positron ion stream. He ain’t afraid of no ghost. (PG-13)