It’s all because of the yellow and purple jerseys.
They were cool.
The only team in the NBA that did not wear white unis when playing at home, the Los Angeles Lakers also had the fashion sense to make their road duds purple.
As a 5-year-old, I was hooked.
Sure, Kareem lofting those skyhooks and Magic running the vaunted fast break before throwing a no-look pass to Worthy for a dunk so high flying I thought he’d never come down were all cool?
But mostly, it was the yellow and purple jerseys.
In that respect, sometimes I guess I sort of wish I was Peter Pan. Not that I’m enamored of being some green spandex-wearing woman trying really hard to lower her voice two octaves?it’s just that sometimes I just wish I didn’t have to grow up.
Things are so much easier when you’re younger and your only worry in the world is if today’s episode of “He-Man” is one you’ve seen already.
Back in high school, I had an English teacher who worshipped Thoreau. Mr. Crooks probably would’ve had Thoreau’s babies if he could have, a century of time and some rather severe anatomical incongruities notwithstanding.
And so, of course, he loved “Walden.” And while that translated into some cool bonus points for me, courtesy of my surname, the book itself didn’t take. I hated it. Loathed it. Abhorred it like no other. Couldn’t have despised “Walden” more if it was written by Kevin McHale.
Thoreau did make one lucid point, though, when he admonished people to “simplify, simplify, simplify.”
It’s all too complicated now.
When I was 5, the only consideration I had about the world of sports was whether or not the guys wearing the yellow and purple would beat the guys wearing something else.
And now?
You’ve got Major League Baseball trying to contract two teams, one of whom (the Twins) is owned by Carl Pohlad, who in 1995 violated MLB’s rules by giving a loan to Bud Selig, the baseball commish whose daughter, Wendy, now owns the Milwaukee Brewers.
Kind of convenient that, if the Twins go bye-bye, Pohlad gets a much bigger financial settlement than if he were simply to sell the team. Also kind of convenient that, with Minnesota out of the picture, Milwaukee suddenly has a much greater share of the Midwest market.
Interesting too that Pohlad also gave a loan to Jerry McMorris, who owns the Colorado Rockies and just happens to be the guy who first raised the issue of contraction back in ’99.
Meanwhile, you’ve got the owner of the Expos trying to buy the Marlins, the owner of the Marlins trying to buy the Red Sox, and MLB using its own personnel to staff the Expos.
Oh yeah, and MLB’s collective bargaining agreement is up and either a lockout or strike is probably imminent.
You’ve got NBA owners getting fined a half-million dollars for criticizing refs, MVP centers getting suspended for trying to decapitate their opponents and just about every franchise not located in either New York or L.A. paying lip service to relocating to Norfolk, Va., because their current stadiums don’t have enough luxury boxes.
You’ve got NFL coaches getting fired for making the Playoffs but not reaching the Super Bowl, wives filing $100 million lawsuits when their athlete husbands die of heat stroke, and refs ending games in Cleveland early because unruly fans are throwing beer bottles onto the field.
You’ve got the BCS?
Yeah?sometimes I just want to be 5 again so the only sports issue I have to think about is whether the Lakers are wearing their yellow or purple jerseys tonight.
Eric welcomes feedback at: [email protected].