Slut. The word raises as many eyebrows as a sheer blouse and stiletto heels. Spoken in the popular language of sex, rumors and innuendos, the four-letter word has spread beyond locker room gossip into everyday discourse.
At its most basic level, the word slut refers to a sexually promiscuous individual?most commonly a woman. The implications of the term, as it has moved from a slang word to a social title, are more complex.
The title “slut” is thrown around for reasons that have nothing to do with promiscuity. The question, then, of what it takes, to “earn” such a title is difficult to answer.
To Liz Rago, programs coordinator for the Women’s Resource Center, the answer to that question is quite clear.
“Women don’t earn a title like that,” she says.
Rago does, however, recognize that sexually active women are often described with derogatory language.
“If women choose to have sex, then they are the sluts, the whores. When men have sex, we say, ‘Boys will be boys’ or ‘they can’t help it,'” she says.
Such a double standard has been a long time in the making. “Historically, women take responsibility for morality. Women are the gatekeepers of sex, while men aren’t seen as having as much control over their sexual desires,” she says.
Women who have sex may be seen as unlady-like in abandoning that role.
Traditional social norms can make women shy away from talking openly about their sexuality. Women, Rago says, are, “shamed if they have needs. People assume, ‘she must be a whore.'”
Jamie Spann, a junior in political science at the U, agrees with that point, saying, “Women who are vocal about their sexuality are labeled.”
Spann also feels women are unfairly judged by other, sometimes ridiculous, criteria. “Even smoking would label me as a slut,” she says.
Physical appearance, from a woman in a short skirt to one with a cigarette in her hand, contribute to the labeling. Ryan Krause, a senior in Mass Communication, admits the way a girl dresses carries certain assumptions. As an example, women’s knee-high boots are often nicknamed “f***-me boots,” he notes.
Men are by no means alone in making these assumptions. Women are often just as guilty as men in branding women as sluts based on dress and physical appearance.
“Woman internalize misogyny,” Rago says. “They look at women through a male gaze.”
Ashley Laurella, a freshman at the U, feels that women are even more likely than men to throw around the slut designation. Laurella says jealousy has the most to do with the way women judge each other. “Other girls are threatened by a girl in a revealing outfit?especially if she looks good,” she says.
Physical appearance doesn’t contribute as much to a woman’s reputation as does her behavior, Laurella adds. Behavior doesn’t mean sexual behavior either. “It’s a woman’s attitude more than how many people she has slept with, how a girl talks to other girls or makes herself available to guys,” she says.
Spann recognizes the same focus on a woman’s behavior. “How you act at a party?if you are too flirty or too drunk?can destroy your reputation.”
That reputation may be more fragile than women think.
“It is not even how many people you sleep with as much who you sleep with,” Krause says.
One bad person with a big mouth can do a huge amount of damage, he explains.
“Rumors play a big role,” Krause continues, “the only people who really know are the two who were involved.” Beyond those two individuals, communication can break down and anything goes, he says.
Men tell stories about their sexual experiences to hold their friends’ attention or make themselves look better. “No one is in fact checking on you,” he says.
And what about the man’s reputation? “I know guys I think are slutty,” Laurella says. She also feels girls do not judge “male sluts” as much as men judge the women they consider sluts.
“Many women will still date a guy who sleeps around,” she says.
Such is not the case for men, Krause says. “Nobody wants to date the slut. They think that the stigma will rub off.” Most men prefer to date a woman perceived as virtuous.
Krause also says while he does know of some men who are considered sluts, none of them carry the same stigma as women with that reputation. He feels women are seen in a less positive light because sex itself is, “not seen as people making a joint decision. It is a male making a decision and a woman going along with it.”
The impact of rumors and reputation may not seem like issues at all in a university with 26,000 students. For smaller communities within this campus, like the Greek and dorm communities, personal reputations may have more of an impact.
Ashley Day, a student currently living in the dorms, says it is easy for her to call to mind several girls who are thought of as sluts in the dorms. Day says that even the dorms have a “walk of shame,” where a girl is seen walking home early in the morning wearing the same clothes she had on the night before. Her makeup and her hair are messy, according to Day.
Fraternity houses are given the most credit, though, for the coining the phrase “walk of shame”?the walk a woman takes out of a man’s bedroom. While Spann, also a member of the greek system, says some fraternity men exaggerate and spread stories, she feels fraternity men are no worse about labeling women.
Krause also dismisses the stereotype that fraternity members degrade women, saying, “I don’t think it is the greek system. Unfortunately, we still live in a male dominated society.”
The male-dominated society aside, Spann finds Utah society to be extremely close minded to issues of female sexuality. “Here it is all hush hush. I don’t see Utah society changing with the nation,” she says.
To Spann, Utah’s “hush hush” mentality has a far greater impact on young women than many think. Noting women are considered “bad” for having sex before marriage, Spann says many young women feel too ashamed to go to a gynecologist or take birth control. “Some women don’t use birth control because of it’s negative connotation?if you are on it, you ‘must be a slut,'” she says.
However, Spann feels women are gaining some sexual freedom. Shows like “Sex in the City” make the point that women can enjoy sex without being sluts, she says.
Spann still recognizes the “damned if you don’t, damned if you do” reality facing women. “If a women is flirtatious and doesn’t hook-up with a guy, she is considered a tease, which is a horrible label too. Labeling women by their sexual behavior is ridiculous?but I don’t see it changing anytime soon.”