Editor:
Honey, this is Jo Mama speaking. I know you told me not to try and contact you when you are at work, but I have to tell you something. Jo Papa and I think that things have gone too far. I can’t even go to the grocery store without someone recognizing me because of your jokes.
And listen to this: Yesterday, Jo Grandma called and said that we are no longer invited to family picnics. Thanks to your shenanigans, I will never get her fried chicken recipe. She was really angry on the phone. She said you have made a mockery of the family name. Jo Cousins were even more upset. Jo Aunt said that they were thinking of legally changing their names.
I know that I shouldn’t be complaining. Nacho Mama has it even worse than I do. She said that on the way home from work yesterday she got pulled over for speeding. But she really wasn’t breaking the law. You know how slow Nacho drives.
I told her she should file a complaint at the police department. Name profiling is a federal offense, you know. Or at least it should be.
Anyway, Jo Papa said that I am too worked up about this and should join a name therapy group. I went to the meeting last week, and I ran into someone that I didn’t expect to see. You remember Aunt Jimama, right? Well, she’s out of rehab and has successfully started her own syrup business. Who would have thought?
Anyway, Jo Papa and I are very proud of you, and we know that you will make the right decision.
Hugs and kisses?
Jo Mama
Disclaimer: The Comical is pure satire and appears at the beginning of every week on The Chronicle’s Web site. Please take the stories as jokes and don’t call your lawyer. Thanks.