Ryan Quinn describes coming out to his family and friends as “terrifying,” but the decision to come out to his fellow U ski team members was even tougher.
Though the Alaska native realized he was attracted to males in high school, he pushed those feelings aside and focused on sports.
Quinn didn’t admit to himself that he was gay until his first year of college, and then he took about a year to tell his parents and close friends.
“I should have known earlier that I was gay, but I think being involved with sports delayed that because being gay is not a social option,” said Quinn, who is graduating this year with a degree in business administration.
Quinn began living two lives-one with his gay friends and the other with his team.
“I actually felt more uncomfortable being ‘the jock’ around my gay friends than being gay around my teammates because my sexuality was just something that I didn’t share with the team,” he said.
But after two years of being out to his friends and family, Quinn decided it was time to merge his two lives. He first told his former male roommate and current team member, and then told a couple of female members on the team.
Then, about a week later at a team party, Quinn took his teammates aside and told each of them one-on-one.
“I didn’t want anyone to find out from someone else on the team, and my teammates really appreciated my honesty,” he said. “Everyone [on the team] was like ‘We respect, know and like you,’ and they were immediately supportive.”
The next morning, some of his teammates called him and asked if he was OK with coming out, and reiterated their support for Quinn.
Kevin Sweeney, the ski team coach, also supported Quinn.
“Being supportive is not a problem for me or Ryan’s fellow teammates. We have a lot of respect for each other, and we spend a lot of time on the road together and competing, so we have got to support each other,” Sweeney said.
Quinn also notes the individual nature of cross country skiing.
“There’s not a lot of awkwardness among the team because we respect each other. We travel a lot together, but there are no locker-room scenarios,” he said.
Which may be why Quinn’s coming out was easily accepted by his teammates. But for other, more full-contact sports, that may not be the case.
Anthony White, a backup safety for the U football team, says he wouldn’t personally have a problem with a gay football player, but he could foresee problems with the team.
“When I look at teammates, I think about how well they are playing, which is what any good team does, but I think having a gay player on a football team could be a distraction for the team, even if the individual players were OK with it,” he said.
White, who will serve as the Vice President of the Associated Students of the University of Utah next year, says a gay football player would likely face a lot more adversity than someone in Quinn’s position.
“Football is probably looked at as the most masculine sport, and so I think it would probably be three times as hard for a football player to come out,” he said.
White chalks up the fact that very few football players on all levels-from high school to pro-are openly gay.
“Those guys are going to face a lot of pressure to not be on the team, and that’s got to be really hard,” White said.
That pressure is one of the reasons Quinn decided to come out. He served on the advisory board of the first National Gay and Lesbian Athletics Conference, which was set up to start discussions around the nation about making athletics a safe zone for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender community.
“The conference gave us information so we could go back to our schools and teams and help the athletics department be aware of homophobia and how to counteract it,” he said.
Earlier this month, Quinn gave a presentation at the Student Athlete Mentors program, which is run by the U’s athletics department.
This semester, the program has focused on respect of diversity, so Quinn was a welcome speaker, said Mary Bowman, U assistant athletics director over student athlete support services.
This is the first semester the program has focused on respecting diversity. The subject didn’t come up due to any specific incident, but rather a focus on awareness and education, Bowman said.
Charles Milne, director of the LGBT Resource Center, supports the department’s program because of its emphasis on starting conversations that breakdown stereotypes society has of the LGBT community.
“There are a lot of athletic people out there, and sexual orientation doesn’t dictate that,” he said.
Quinn is a case in point.
Quinn participated on the Junior National Ski Team from 1996-2000. He won second place in both 1997 and 1998 at the Alaska State Skiing Championships and garnered the title of Junior National Champion in 2000.
He was a member of his high school cross country team, and won third place in the 1998 Alaska State Championships.
That trend continued into college, with continued cross country skiing success. Quinn is a two-time NCAA All-American, and in U.S. national competition, he placed 11th in the 2002 sprint and 10th in the 2003 sprint. Quinn was also the Utah 2003 top men’s cross-country point scorer.
When successful athletes like Quinn decide to come out, it helps other gay athletes feel more comfortable coming out, Milne said.
“The program creates an atmosphere where people are comfortable talking about their feelings and problems,” he said. “Through the visibility of people like Ryan coming out, it shows everyone that a person can be a good athlete and can be gay,” he said.
While Quinn says activism was never a life goal, he says his experience has made him want to share it with others. Quinn wrote an article about being a gay athlete for the Web site outsports.com, an LGBT athletic site, and he received e-mails from all over the country from athletes who were afraid to come out. Quinn then realized the help he could provide to those in such a situation.
“Activism was one way to help other athletes with the coming out process,” he said. “If I had known an openly gay athlete, I think I would have come out a lot sooner.”