During one of my daily internal dialogues…OK, OK, when I was talking to myself yesterday, I came across a perplexing question: What is going on in the minds of fair-weather fans? I’ve always harbored a pretty serious hatred for them. A hatred propagated by my undying loyalty to losers, and the pain of every world championship celebration that I’m not a part of. A hatred justified by the excessive post-championship fanfare supported in large part by a group of people with no prior associations to the champion. And finally, a hatred cemented by the New York Yankees and two-thirds of their “fan base.”
Do fair-weather fans have a justifiable position? Or are their ever-revolving affiliations an indication of a major character flaw? Take, for example, the case of Michael Jordan.
The man was one hell of a basketball player. Every game he ever played in was worth watching because he dominated a sport for close to a decade. As a Celtics fan, I hid my admiration for Jordan behind the good old “I hate this guy” facade. I did hate him, but only because he always beat the Celtics. Looking back, though, I loved the way he played.
As the Bulls improved, and Jordan became invincible, I noticed a mass conversion in team support from the Celtics to the Bulls in the area schools. When I questioned my friends as to why they had changed allegiances, they answered simply: Jordan.
At the time I didn’t understand it, but now I do. Larry Bird’s career was coming to a close, and the Celtics were entering their lean years. Jordan’s Bulls were on the rise and fun to watch. An easy decision for any NBA fan, right?
Not so fast. Keep in mind that the majority of the converts were kids. All they saw were the highlights and razzle-dazzle of the Bulls and they fell in love with it. Their change of heart was a direct result of the media’s influence over an impressionable mind. (Highlights make Grizzlies point guard Jason Williams look like a good player, but he sucks.) As soon as the media shifts its focus, these fans shifted as well.
How many Bulls fans are there now? More importantly to our debate, how many Wizards fans?
That brings us back to the question of the moment: Does following a player justify a change in allegiance? Or is that just a sorry excuse to leave a team in tough times? Answer: It’s a question of loyalty.
Most of the time, being devoted to a player is no different from being devoted to a team. Because free agency makes it easier for players to switch teams, switching affiliations because a player does is often justifiable. Just don’t give up on a player in his lean years.
Speaking of lean years, how many Yankee fans have ever heard of Don Mattingly? My guess is one-third. The point is, my hatred of fair-weather fans has been accentuated by my inherent hatred of the New York Yankees and their fickle fan base.
For example, about 10 friends and I, all Red Sox faithful, were sitting in a booth at a sports bar in Boston watching the Red Sox take on the Yankees in Fenway Park. For those of you who don’t know what it’s like on the Northeast corridor of the U.S. during baseball season, Red Sox-Yankees games take precedence over parties, court dates, sex, religious ceremonies, most weddings and some funerals. The outcome of the series has the potential to ruin your life for a solid week.
But I digress.
So the game is in the eighth inning, the Red Sox are down by one and starting to rally, when a couple sits down at the table most adjacent to mine. We don’t notice them until the woman says in a vivid New York accent, “Ooh, honey, is that Derek Jeter?”
The man she’s referring to is Mariano Rivera, who has just come trotting in from the bullpen to save the day for the Yankees. The comment is initially forgiven and forgotten. So she doesn’t know baseball, so what?
As the inning wears on, the Sox get a clutch two-out hit by Jason Varitek and tie the game at three, which causes my friends and I to erupt in semi-sober jubilation. But our cheers prompt this incredibly loud and abrasive response from our New Yorker lady friend:
“What’s the problem with you Red Sox fans? You get too excited about meaningless games. Just calm yourselves down until the World Series, baby!”
Every group of Sox fans that heard her insensitive remarks could now be seen in mini conferences discussing the following topics:
1. How much we hate New Yorkers.
2. Like those are real!
3. What the f*** does she know?
The latter was my focus as I sat back in contemplative silence. This woman had pushed all the wrong buttons and put me in quite a rage.
“Red Sox fans are like a woman who sticks by her man no matter how bad he treats her,” I defiantly responded. “He’ll cheat on her, leave her and then she’ll welcome him back with open arms. She can’t explain why, but she just loves the man.
“But you fair-weather Yankee fans are like a woman married to a bank account. You don’t speak to your man, you don’t pleasure your man, you don’t even care about your man until payday and then suddenly he’s your best friend. Who is more despicable?”
Unfortunately, I didn’t think of this ingenious response until I was driving home after a 4-3 loss.
So who is more despicable in this case? The Red Sox fan who remains devoted for seemingly no reason, or the Yankees fan who devotes seven days a year to the team so he or she can revel in the celebration?
Answer: The fair-weather Yankee fan. No integrity, no real passion in his or her life, just riding the smooth train to another mediocre celebration.
The Red Sox fan, on the other hand, has suffered for such a long time that the celebration of the next championship will be incredible.
Delayed pleasure is always better-hands down-and Red Sox fans have been teased unbearably for 85 years.
This torture has been exacted on many other fan bases (Chicago Cubs and White Sox, Philadelphia Eagles, for example). But the fact remains that they still have fan bases thanks to the loyal constituents of their fine ballclubs.
So what’s been discovered in this inquiry? Well, that wasn’t really the point, was it? We all knew we weren’t going to discover anything.
I only meant to justify my hatred of this shallow, heartless group of sub-human scum. (Sorry about that, I guess I need to release some Soxual frustration.)