Masculinity is a term layered with meaning and expectations — a term that has remained a symbol of what a man should be, rather than a description of how some men can be. If you were asked to discuss what it means to be a man, you might say a man, with the traditional conception of masculinity in mind, is supposed to be responsible for his actions and to protect his family.
These are qualities worthy of praise and shouldn’t be looked down upon, but what does it really mean to be a man in the modern world? We could say true masculinity emerges from what men say to one another in the locker room.
In a sociology class, led by professor Marie Gaytán, all of the male students were told to contemplate the “locker room” meaning of what it is to be a man.
When the notetaker announced the contents of their discussion to the entire class, the list contained such comments as: “being with multiple girls,” “knowing how fix cars,” “not revealing too much emotion,” “refuting offensive accusations” and “being successful athletically.”
These are, however, merely perpetuations of the stereotypical version of masculinity, which is narrowly defined and exclusive.
The media is complicit in perpetuating these notions. On his radio show, for instance, Howard Stern would have bikini-clad women attend his broadcast, and he would then rate them based on their “hotness.”
This mentality of “putting women in their place” reifies a hierarchical gender structure. It is also seen as an expectation of masculinity. Men must always have the upper hand and advantageous position in a relationship, especially those with a woman.
Hollywood, too, is complicit. Just look at the extent to which sizes of guns used in motion pictures have changed over the years.
In Dr. No, released in 1962, the gun that Bob Simmons used was a M1911A1 with an 8-inch barrel. The Smith and Wesson 29 model used in Dirty Harry is an approximate 9-inch barrel. In First Blood, the famous character Rambo would use M60 machine gun as his weapon of choice.
This growth in gun size does much to perpetuate a violent component to the notion of masculinity.
It has perhaps even contributed to the violent mass shootings, which are marks of our generation. In interviews with the male shooters, those who didn’t have a beneficial experience with their peers said that the reason behind their murders was that they weren’t respected as they should have been, and felt they would earn the respect they deserved and “show” the bullies what they had coming.
Male athletes counterintuitively show a different side of masculinity. They donate time to charities they believe in. They often lose and are forced to cope with loss in responsible ways. Some have been brave enough even to cry on camera during their passionate speeches concerning their charitable causes and motivations.
Men should be raised to understand that emotionality, not stoic indifference, is an integral part of masculinity. We need to redefine what it means to be a man. Media should not dictate the way masculinity is defined.