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(Image from mynewwalk.com)

Summer brings with it the optimal environment for upping that “selfie game.” With an abundance of share- and brag-worthy activities and vacations, and a little more time on our hands, everyone seems to put even more time and effort than usual into showing themselves off to a digital world of strangers and hazy acquaintances. I’ve had a few experiences this summer which seemed to slap me in the face with concerns about the rampant and grossly accepted narcissism that overwhelms our current culture.

It is usually understood that some narcissism in each of us can be a positive thing. It allows for the development of a sound sense of self, which is important for personal success in all areas of life. Some degree of narcissism, such as worrying about what others think about you, can also be good in generating some awareness of how people conduct themselves in society and relationships. But these days narcissistic practices seem to have stretched far beyond the bounds of extreme.

I love my best friend, but she has some narcissistic qualities that are difficult for me to ignore. For her, summer isn’t about enjoying every bit of carefree activities, like camping, road trips and swimming. No. For her, summer is about taking selfies and posting them onto social media with a caption that reads as though she is genuinely and completely enjoying the activity she claims to be engaged in. This seems pretty difficult considering she usually spends fifteen or twenty minutes taking the selfie, applying a filter, posting it with some cheesy, overly enthusiastic caption, etc. Once the posting is complete, it astounds me how obsessed she is with getting “likes” (if she doesn’t get “enough” she will delete the post to “save the embarrassment”). And the same sort of concern crosses over to Instagram, where she has tried every method in the book to accumulate followers.

My second experience, while brief, hit me probably just as hard as seeing my best friend progress through this evolution of self-obsession manifested in social media. I was at Boondocks one night with some friends. While we were waiting in line for the go-karts, I noticed a young girl (couldn’t have been more than eleven) primping her hair and puckering her lips to take the perfect selfie while her friend accelerated into her from the kart behind and an employee gave his little how-to/when-to speech for the track. My point is she was completely oblivious to the experience she was “participating” in because she was so completely consumed by taking a meaningless selfie to document a moment and share it with a mass group of people who, honestly, really don’t care about the everyday life of a fifth grader – the life that she is essentially missing out on.

I can’t say I blame these two for being self-absorbed the way they are when they are living in a world where such actions and obsessions are encouraged by celebrities who are often shallow posers, and who, for some reason, are extremely socially successful. The way celebrities are perceived so positively through electronic means that “directly” engage the general public seems to make others feel that they can use Twitter like the Kardashians and essentially be as “special” as they are, or as special as they are perceived to be in the eyes of the public. People seem to feel a connection with famous people who use the same social apps that they do, and it creates a false sense of worth and a narcissistic desire for immense popularity and recognition. Furthermore, it seems that we have created an unhealthy environment for competition where everyday people work ridiculously hard to feed the illusion that they’re generating social status and popularity with people they barely know and whose opinions about them really shouldn’t matter.

It seems to me that peoples’ priorities are just out of line these days. Instead of caring about investing time into things that matter and will generate genuine happiness, like actual personal relationships (not with Facebook “friends”), success in work, attention to family, effort in school, etc., people spend their time on social media – judging others, following celebrities (many of whom arguably contribute very little to society), and posting incessantly to make themselves feel good when they get a couple hundred “likes” by people who probably mindlessly scrolled through their feed and happened upon a post which they “liked” with half-assed concern. Such intense narcissism, fueled by obsessions with personal showcasing’s on social media, is just out of line. I wish people would take a break from themselves, rearrange their priorities, and enjoy and contribute to life in a more genuine way, which may mean putting the phone away for a while and actually making some real memories.

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