The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

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Want your voice to be heard? Submit a letter to the editor, send us an op-ed pitch or check out our open positions for the chance to be published by the Daily Utah Chronicle.
@TheChrony

Counterpoint: No We Don’t

By The Legislature

It’s OK, we don’t like you either. But really, we don’t suck.

You know, this whole thing is so you?you always wanted more attention than we got. You can’t push around words like what you just said thinking that you will escape unscathed. In fact, after we read your part in this editorial, we decided to hack off another $950,000. Say goodbye to the accounting department!

Welcome to politics. We might not use manifest destiny, but we do have one thing: a Republican stronghold that can burn your budget booty for the rest of the millennium.

Oh, but that’s right?you’re not going to be here. That’s OK, long after you are gone, we will continue to decrease higher education funding until the word “education” doesn’t even exist.

Yep, start sending your kids to the College of Massage Therapy, ’cause it’s going to be the only college around.

To conclude, our dear friends and colleagues, you said that we suck.

But according to our favorite document, the U.S. Constitution, the Utah State Legislature rules!!!

Disclaimer: The Comical is pure satire and appears at the beginning of every week on The Chronicle’s Web site. Please take the stories as jokes and don’t call your lawyer. Thanks.

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