I am writing in order to offer some support to the article written by RuthAnne Frost in Tuesday’s Chronicle. She brought up some very strong points about why we at the U are so much better than those others at the Y and how that enables us to unite. The dorm situation, church services actually being held in lecture halls, the infamous Honor Code, and the parking situation are all MAJOR reasons why I would never go to the Y. I mean, seriously, I came to college to party, not to concentrate on making something of myself. And how can you party if your dorms aren’t cool, if every time you go to class you have to face the fact that there were people actually being spiritual in that room on Sunday, if there’s a code that prohibits you from having ten people on your bed at once, and if you have to look hard for parking spaces?
Not only that, but take a look at the rankings. BYU got the top spot for Stone-Cold Sober Schools in the Princeton Review’s university rankings. How are we supposed to have fun without the glorious effects of alcohol? And their ranking of 6th for Best Quality of Life obviously contains a lurking variable – apparently when taking into account “quality of life” they didn’t take into account the “fun” factor. Some people I know who go to school “down south” say they decided to because it’s a good education at a quality price. Come on. Just because they are ranked 25th in the Best Values category of U.S. News and World Report’s university rankings and the U wasn’t even in the top 50 doesn’t mean you’re really going to get a better deal. And if I cared about my education I might care that our professors were ranked 12th in the Make Themselves Scarce category or that the Y was ranked 74th in Best National Universities while the U was only at 111th. But I don’t care and neither should you – because our football team is better! Go Utes.
So let us unite in our hatred. Let us stand with RuthAnne as she proudly proclaims our superiority to those “down south”. Let us praise Coach Meyer, even though he will undoubtedly leave us in a year or two. Let us dog-pile our drunkenness on our beds, if only because they can’t do it at the Y. Let us bask in the joy of good parking and better meal plans. And let us never, ever consider that perhaps we have something to learn.
-Anonymous at the U