To Calendar or not to Calendar

Jan. 26Wednesday

Riddle me this: What would happen if you took away all the Ritalin of the Riddlin’ Kids, or even more, that of the band’s target audience? Calendar doesn’t really think it’d make that much of a difference: If the kids liked three-minute, hook-laden, substance-free (ironic, isn’t it?) mallpunk before, then hell, a lower attention span might as well help the cause. The Riddlin’ Kids will be performing with American Hi-Fi, MC Lars and Bowling For Soup tonight at In The Venue (219 S. 600 West). Show starts at 6:30 p.m. You can hustle your $15 tickets at all Smith’sRx.

Oh, Paris, you silly, silly girl. Two nights ago, she finds herself alongside Nicole “What else rhymes with…?” Ritchie serendipitously watching the arrest of their friend, fashion photographer/director David LaChapelle, after LaChapelle causes a scene outside of one of Park City’s velvet ropes early Sunday morning.

A few days before, she is officially charged by the LAPD for trying to steal a copy of her own filmmaking debut, “One Night In Paris” that sadly never made it to Sundance. (Although, we should note, what a true celebration of “independent film” it is-dig the lighting…) So how fitting is it that tonight is both the season premiere of “The Simple Life: Interns” (FOX, 8 p.m.) and the performance of Salt Lake City’s own indie-rockers In Camera (indie rock in Salt Lake City? Really?) at Kilby Court around 7 p.m. Tickets are $5 at the door.

NHL hockey is, by far and away, one of the most exciting live sporting spectacles one could ever go watch-did you know that blood bounces on ice? Too bad those overpaid Canuck/Commie floozies are on strike. Watch it, Kretezkov, or we’ll send the Peristroika after you. In the mean time, you’ll just have to settle for the Utah Grizzles. They’ll be trying to eat the Chicago Wolves and anybody else who’s got a problem with minor league hockey when $1 drafts night goes down tonight at the E-Center (3200 S. Decker Lake Dr.). Tickets range from $7-29. Face-off is at 7 p.m.

It’s College Night at both the Circle Lounge (328 S. State St.) and Port O’ Call (78 W. 400 South) tonight. For those who don’t know already, “College Night” is a deceiving way to steal your money and get you drunk. Deceiving? Well, yeah-what else do you call something that knowingly erases your memory and empties your wallet? Dorm-bathroom stoners, we’re talking to you, too…

What do The Beatles and Shakespeare have in common? Fish and chips. Brilliance. The pocket-sized toaster. (Acid! – Ed.)Someone over at the Babcock Theatre has a better idea, apparently. The two have managed to mix in the University of Utah department of theatre’s presentation of Shakespeare’s “The Comedy of Errors” tonight at 7:30 p.m.