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The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

The University of Utah's Independent Student Voice

The Daily Utah Chronicle

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Want your voice to be heard? Submit a letter to the editor, send us an op-ed pitch or check out our open positions for the chance to be published by the Daily Utah Chronicle.
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Dating contract

With Valentine’s Day fast approaching. Dating as a whole is kind of a harsh process. In order to make dating less confusing, the following contract has been formulated. It is written so that a man may present it to a woman at the beginning of a relationship.

Upon this the, _____(day) of _______(month) ________(year),

for the purpose of sanity, order and open and honest communication, the following contractual agreement has been formulated.

Article I-Dating-For the purpose of clear communication of signals and fiscal balance, the woman will be responsible for the initiation and planning of the third date. If, at this point she isn’t very interested in the guy, then she can let the whole thing dissolve by simply not initiating the date.

If the third date is not initiated within 2 weeks of the second date, then the man should clearly assume the relationship is terminated.

Article II-Telephone calls-at least every third “What’s up?” phone call is the responsibility of the woman. When one calls, the other should return the phone call as early as convenient, but within 24 hours.

Article III-Text messages-no text messaging to each other unless one of the two is at school or work; a real phone call is required. No text messaging on the date. While a phone may be taken on the date, it should be treated as if it were off or broken.

Article IV-Define The Relationship (DTR)-at date ____(date number) there will be a DTR. At the said DTR, the status of the relationship will be addressed, including the status of “We’re Dating,” boyfriend/girlfriend and dating exclusively.

Article V-Eating-If you are hungry, eat! Eat a lot. If you are not hungry, don’t order anything. [There are starving kids in Ethiopia]

Article VI-Finishing off the night-If a guy is taking you out for a second time, then it is obvious he likes you enough that he would like to kiss you. It is realized that good things take time. The woman will make a clear and defining gesture communicating that she wants a hug, a kiss on the cheek or Oh Baby.

Article VII-Closure-if there is any sudden change in the direction of the relationship, then honest expression of feelings, emotions and intentions should occur. There will be no leading on, mind games or wondering what in the hell is going on.

Article VIII. Any mutually agreed clause not previously mentioned or amendments may be entered here:

I _________________________ (state full name), the woman in the prospective relationship do hereby acknowledge and accept the term and rules of the said dating game.

_________date

I__________________________(state full name), the man of the prospective relationship, do hereby witness and attest to the agreement by ___________________________(woman’s name) and also agree to follow all rules as stated. _________date

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