We’re all going to hell

By By Victoria Johnson

By Victoria Johnson

Lamb of GodSacramentEpicFive out of five stars

This is the best black metal you’ll get this side of Denmark, folks-so this Sunday, go to church, take the Sacrament and “BURN WITH ME IN HELL!!!!”Of course, first-rate black metal will always come from Scandinavia, but for five guys from Richmond, Va., Lamb of God members hold up just fine-you’d think they’d rowed to the United States in a Viking ship with Satan’s minions at the oars.But this isn’t just some cheesy metal-tribute band. The group describes its music as “pure-American metal” and that is just what it plays-authentic, skull-shattering, bone-crunching, soul-sucking metal-American style.Admittedly, I am not a huge metal fan, but I can appreciate a band that does it right-dark, guttural vocals, manic fret-tapping guitar solos and frenzied drumming that must reach 180 beats-per-minute.It will work you over.And though I generally can’t listen to metal for more than 10 minutes at a time, sometimes I find it is the ultimate musical catharsis. Just like classic country is arguably the best way to soothe a bad hangover, metal is the best way to visit the dark side of your sick, twisted soul and help you learn to own it-so it doesn’t own you. WA HA HA HA HA!!!And with that, here are some words from our brothers in darkness, Lamb of God:”Blacken the cursed sun / You’re not the only one / To have sunk so far and low / There is no tomorrow.”Amen.