Zion curtain’ should cover everything offensive

By By Nicholas Pappas

By Nicholas Pappas

Dear Daily Utah Chronicle,

I thought I was safe. I live in a beautiful community in West Jordan. The houses fit together like puzzle pieces. When I enjoy a day of scrapbooking in a neighbor’s home, it’s nice to know the layout is no different from my own.

Diversity is the devil’s work.

I went out with my family to enjoy the finest cuisine Utah has to offer-our very own The Cheesecake Factory. Although I had to wait more than four hours to seat a family of eight, I felt it would be worth it for a slice of indulgence. I was wrong.

My eyes were burning. In plain view of my children were shelves lined with alcohol. My youngest pulled on my dress and asked me what all the putrid, brown liquid was. I was wiping away tears!

We got our cheesecake to go.

For this reason, I applaud liquor control commissioner Bobbie Coray for pleading with her colleagues to establish a “Zion Curtain” covering the alcohol in local restaurants from innocent eyes.

When I go out with my family, I want them to enjoy their molten chocolate cake, white chocolate blondie or crispy green bean fries in peace. I don’t want to have to explain why everyone around us is laughing and having a good time.

Dinner for eight is expensive enough, and that doesn’t even include the 10 percent tip!

I wish more of our elected officials would follow Coray’s lead. There are so many more devilish deeds around us that need to be covered up.

I’ve tried putting blindfolds on my children when I take them out, but they keep running into light poles.

This is why I think it’s in the best interest of our community to begin operation “Zion Curtain.” We should not stop at only covering up tempting and seductive bottles of alcohol. The city is full of corruption.

We should start at our local schools. They need a complete overhaul. Girls walk around in short skirts, pants and strapped shirts that show off their shoulders. No man should see their shoulders but their husbands on their wedding night-and only in the dark!

This is the reason I homeschool my children.

Girls should walk around with “Zion Curtains” on. They should be pure white and cover up everything that should not be used or seen (although they can keep their mouths uncovered, if they stay in line).

Of course, we should allow armholes for baking cakes, sewing and general preparation for a happy marriage.

Let’s also not forget Barnes & Noble. I can no longer purchase books there because of all the filth they sell. Dirty magazines and violent novels are everywhere. They even have cookbooks that promote using spices!

I propose we cover all of them with nice, dark blue covers.

I want to thank Coray for getting the ball rolling on shielding our children. There have been far too many of them who stared at a bottle of alcohol and could not control the urge to imbibe.

As long as temptation is kept out of sight and out of mind, how could anything bad ever happen?

Sincerely,The Blind Leading the Blind

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