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It pains me to admit this, but the definitive characteristic of my personality is neither my impeccable taste in clothing nor my ability to brighten any sullen situation with a punch line from my repertoire of cringe-worthy dad-jokes. The most important facet of my character actually lies in the fact that, at any given moment, I am equal parts six-year-old boy, elderly man and tweenage girl.
Though the idea of this hodgepodge of traits seems conflicting and unpleasant at first, I’ve grown to adore this eclectic assortment of qualities. Assuming the nature of glamorous 13-year-old girls everywhere, my inner tween often hogs the spotlight. The old man and little boy are usually spotted in the subtleties of my demeanor, while the teenage girl bombastically shoves her way to the surface and makes her presence known to the world.
Most importantly, however, the tween in me has successfully nurtured a top-notch obsession with celebrities, fashion and pop-culture. I talk about the Kardashians like they’re my own quirky family and of supermodels like Cara Delevingne, Karlie Kloss and Joan Smalls like they’re a contrived group of popular girls that I fake being friends with to gain status and rank in the ravenous deathtrap known as high school.
Because of this, the term “fashion icon” has become one of the most vital terms in my vocabulary. For as long as I can remember I have been gushing over the sartorial stylings of countless musicians, actors, artists, writers, socialites, models and just about any other form of fashionable celebrity. I’ve drawn inspiration from a massive breadth of icons, reaching all the way from the spunk-stuffed Hilary Duff in “Lizzie McGuire” to the bohemian vibe of post-Beatles John Lennon to the sleek, suited Ryan Gosling.
Partly thanks to pop stars of the ‘80s, such as Madonna, and to the booming jump in popularity fashion has experienced in the last 30 years, it is clear that to function as a public figure — be it a musician, an actor or even a first lady — doubling as a fashion icon is imperative. Kate Middleton, Michele Obama, Lady Gaga, Princess Diana, Kanye West, Emma Stone, Jennifer Lawrence and Beyoncé have all utilized fashion to boost public opinion and popularity.
That said, no star has ever been close to reaching the importance of my most beloved icon, who has gracefully inspired the way I dress since I was a toddler. I think the mark of a great fashion icon is the ability to express versatility while staying true to personal style, and this icon does just that. She can wrap herself in fuchsia feather boas — a testament to her unparalleled glamour — and turn around to sport a classic Burberry coat with the poise and intrigue of a modern princess. I’ve seen her successfully rock styles from Dickens-era London, the Victorian Atlantic and outer space. Most importantly, she is wildly proud of her hoggish figure despite the fact that it hardly aligns with the unhealthy ideals of today’s society and hasn’t even considered a nose job to “perfect” her very literal pig nose.
If you haven’t guessed it by now, I’m talking about Miss Piggy. That’s right, the impeccably glitzy Muppet has served diligently as the world’s quintessential fashion icon since her first appearance on television in 1974 and as mine since my first exposure to her all the way back in 1994. She hasn’t aged a day over the course of her incredibly busy career stretching just over four decades.
Look, I know it seems silly, but the longer I ponder this cheery, borderline facetious obsession with Miss Piggy, the more I’m convinced that there really are no other fashion icons with her level of significance. We owe this not only to her impeccable taste but also to her unwavering confidence and pride in herself.
There are plenty of other stars who have made it their civic duty to push the envelope and ignite change in trends and the fashion industry, and if I’m being completely honest, they do it to a much greater degree, but none of these men or women come close to capturing the universal love and adoration that Miss Piggy almost takes for granted. She is an international superstar whose beautiful curves, luscious blonde hair and earnest brazenness continually inspire her audience ranging from infancy to old age.
For anyone even moderately interested in fashion, a fashion icon can be an exceptional source of inspiration. Logging onto my laptop to peek at what my favorite fashion bloggers are pulling off is as comforting as a bowl of vanilla ice cream after a dramatic breakup without all the obvious health detriments. True fashion icons have perfected the art of pulling their act together to look and act provocative and beautiful despite the glut of things that relentlessly pull them down.
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